My interview…
So I agreed to be interviewed by my friend/cousin Annie.
1)What are the three best things about your job?
Three best things about my job as a school based speech therapist would have to be getting to work with children and watching them make progress, learning more about disabilities and how to be more effective in the classroom and more about different styles of learning and teaching, and all the chances that I get on a daily basis to practice being more patient!
2)What is my favorite beverage of choice?
There are a few beverages of choice in my life… if I am going with soda, it would have to be Dr. Pepper or Slice/Sprite/Sierra Mist. I am trying to make sure I only have one of these beverages a day. I also have a fondness for water with lemon, or rather as my friends would say, I like my water WITH my lemons!
3)What nicknames have you had over the years? – Let me think on this… I have been called many things since I was a kid. I think the most popular
choices have been:
Trace MeMe Acey Piglet Trace-a-me Traylynn Princess
4)What top 5 blessings has God given you in your life?
God has given me a lot in my life to be thankful and I am a very blessed person. It is hard to pick only 5 blessings!!!
My nieces – Misti, Syrina, and Kenzie
My family – my parents, grandma, and my extended family
My friends – there are too many to name
The chance to receive a higher education at a wonderful institution
Relationships – I know that they can be rocky and difficult but you learn from each. My most recent relationship, as much as it has killed me to have it end the way it did, was actually a blessing to me and I continue to pray that it will continue to be a blessing in the future. (Read that as the relationship was and continues to be a blessing NOT the relationship ending being a blessing)
5)What is your most embarrassing moment?
Oh wow… I am easily embarrassed so this is difficult to determine where to start. I could start with my father and his crew jumping out of the bushes at UCAT after my first winter formal in high school so that they could escort me to my mom’s car… or my dad’s entire fire station taking turns to drive past the hotel my friends and I were staying after prom my Sr year to keep tabs on me… Or the time I completely forgot my lines in our church Christmas program and I asked what my next line was supposed to be (didn’t help that I had already started using lines from another scene prior to asking for help)… And last but not least... falling (literally) down the stairs at the PAC from the top of the Mezannine to the very bottom when Ethan and I went to see The Phantom of the Opera!
Thanks Annie for the questions!!! I enjoyed thinking back on the different experiences in my life!!!
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
My baby...
Last year in April I decided to trade in my beloved 2002 Acura TL-S for a newer car... one that I thought would be better for me... get better gas mileage... have a warranty... won't have to worry about mechanical problems... so mom and I went looking at new cars... I knew that I liked E's sleek (and in his own words) and sexy black Civic Coupe and I knew that it got decent gas mileage (a lot better than my beautiful Acura!!!)... so off to the Honda dealerships we went!
I pulled off Don Carlton's lot on Thursday, April 3, 2008 with my very own, BRAND SPANKING NEW, sparkly, sleek AND sexy (much sexier than E's black car...) silvery blue Civic. Much to my chagrin there was a freak hail storm that following Monday night... which left me with just about $7000 worth of hail damage that couldn't be taken care of with the oh so convenient dentless repair... it required that my hood, top of the car, AND trunk be replaced along with other parts AND be repainted... Before I could get the hail damage repaired I realized that my car was having mechanical problems. Once again I took my car into the shop to be told that it was all in my head and that the problem didn't exist because the mechanics couldn't repeat the problem... Then just before school started back up I had a mechanical problem with my car. YEAH... notice the streak I have going here... I had to have my fuel pump replaced (under warranty) which did fix part of my previous mechanical problem from the Spring.
WELL... tonight my baby and I apparently were not meant to drive into Tulsa to see the Twilight movie. Driving toward Hwy 20 tonight I was be-bopping to my music on the radio and suddenly I see 2 deer on the side of the road, so I start to slow down... thinking that they would turn and run back into the field like normal. Only to have them both step into the road, I slammed on my brakes and automatically slammed on my horn at the same time... only to have one deer try to fake me out and ultimately hit my car.
I will post pictures once it is daylight and I can see the damage...
I pulled off Don Carlton's lot on Thursday, April 3, 2008 with my very own, BRAND SPANKING NEW, sparkly, sleek AND sexy (much sexier than E's black car...) silvery blue Civic. Much to my chagrin there was a freak hail storm that following Monday night... which left me with just about $7000 worth of hail damage that couldn't be taken care of with the oh so convenient dentless repair... it required that my hood, top of the car, AND trunk be replaced along with other parts AND be repainted... Before I could get the hail damage repaired I realized that my car was having mechanical problems. Once again I took my car into the shop to be told that it was all in my head and that the problem didn't exist because the mechanics couldn't repeat the problem... Then just before school started back up I had a mechanical problem with my car. YEAH... notice the streak I have going here... I had to have my fuel pump replaced (under warranty) which did fix part of my previous mechanical problem from the Spring.
WELL... tonight my baby and I apparently were not meant to drive into Tulsa to see the Twilight movie. Driving toward Hwy 20 tonight I was be-bopping to my music on the radio and suddenly I see 2 deer on the side of the road, so I start to slow down... thinking that they would turn and run back into the field like normal. Only to have them both step into the road, I slammed on my brakes and automatically slammed on my horn at the same time... only to have one deer try to fake me out and ultimately hit my car.
I will post pictures once it is daylight and I can see the damage...
Monday, January 12, 2009
On my feet again
Hey everyone out there in bloggerland that may or may not read my blog... As you know, I have been doing a lot of self-reflecting about my life and my habits. Many people have commented to me on facebook, myspace and here that I don't need to change, I am a wonderful person... even E has told me that I am a great person... but I am not changing for HIM! I want everyone to know that up front...I am wanting to change to be a better ME FOR ME!!!!
I have realized a lot of about me. I don't want to sound conceited or vain, because that is definitely not my intent... I am a very sweet and caring person. I tend to put others needs in front of my own. I go out of my way to help those that matter the most to me, my family and close friends. I am helpful and honest. I typically say what I am thinking, and sometimes to a fault. I am outgoing, almost always cheerful (except at the wee crack of dawn hours) and I try to see the sunnyside of situations. I know I am bubbly, sometimes annoyingly bubbly and perky... but that is me... I am chatty and childish... I like to be tucked in by that special someone and kissed good night before falling asleep. I still sleep with a stuffed animal or at least have something in my arms when I fall asleep (at least a pillow or blanket)... I am goofy and like to try new things, at least MOST things...
In the last few weeks I have realized that I have gotten into a bad habit of cutting people off, putting my needs first in conversations, not asking about others until I am finished with my thoughts... As I so sweetly was told the other night, I need to remember my SUMMARY button and use it more often...
I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers these past few weeks. I know that they are what has helped me make it through this trying time in my life. I ask that you continue to pray for both myself and E to be able to let go of past hurts and be able to continue to talk to each other and move past this hurdle in our lives. We both need the prayers.
THANK you Annie for your support and words of wisdom. I am doin my best to follow your advice because it is sooooo accurate and right on! And THANK YOU Aunt Kim and "Mom" Ronda for both being here for me. E commented the other day on the three of you being so right about me from your posts on facebook, on here, and in person.
I have realized a lot of about me. I don't want to sound conceited or vain, because that is definitely not my intent... I am a very sweet and caring person. I tend to put others needs in front of my own. I go out of my way to help those that matter the most to me, my family and close friends. I am helpful and honest. I typically say what I am thinking, and sometimes to a fault. I am outgoing, almost always cheerful (except at the wee crack of dawn hours) and I try to see the sunnyside of situations. I know I am bubbly, sometimes annoyingly bubbly and perky... but that is me... I am chatty and childish... I like to be tucked in by that special someone and kissed good night before falling asleep. I still sleep with a stuffed animal or at least have something in my arms when I fall asleep (at least a pillow or blanket)... I am goofy and like to try new things, at least MOST things...
In the last few weeks I have realized that I have gotten into a bad habit of cutting people off, putting my needs first in conversations, not asking about others until I am finished with my thoughts... As I so sweetly was told the other night, I need to remember my SUMMARY button and use it more often...
I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers these past few weeks. I know that they are what has helped me make it through this trying time in my life. I ask that you continue to pray for both myself and E to be able to let go of past hurts and be able to continue to talk to each other and move past this hurdle in our lives. We both need the prayers.
THANK you Annie for your support and words of wisdom. I am doin my best to follow your advice because it is sooooo accurate and right on! And THANK YOU Aunt Kim and "Mom" Ronda for both being here for me. E commented the other day on the three of you being so right about me from your posts on facebook, on here, and in person.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Putting my life back together...
I am trying to get my life back together again. After having my world, my hopes, my dreams all thrown up in the air last week, I am striving to be me again. I have been reflecting on my behavior and on the things that were said to me last week. I see what he was saying on several counts and I know that these concerns that he shared are concerns that I don't want linked to me.
I don't want people to think that I am a rude and impolite person. I want people to see me for the person I am. The person who will go out of her way to help others in need and will do anything for my family. I know that I can not change for someone else, or that I shouldn't change specifically for another person. Changing for a person isn't a true change, it is a temporary fix that will eventually unravel. I want to change for me, for my well-being. I am not trying to say that I am an awful or horrible person. I know that I am a good person, I have been reassured of this quite frequently in the past few days... I am just saying that I know that I have room for growth in my life... I want to be a better person, I want to be healthier- eat healthier, workout more, attempt to start jogging again... I want to clean up my language, I have gotten into a bad habit of letting unclean or inappropriate words creep into my vocabulary recently. I want to become a better listener and learn to see things from others perspectives, and recognize when I need to "check" my ego at the door and be willing to look at other perspectives. I need to show the ones that I love that I love them ALL the time, tell them that I am proud of them, bring them up, not break them down. I need to give space when it is needed and when it isn't requested. I can't smother someone with my love, nor can I "dump" all my problems and stress on that person without regards of their personal stresses and stressors. When I do "dump" my stresses, I need to be sure to try to help relieve some of his stresses or be assistive in relieving him of his stresses. I need to show my patient side in ALL areas of life, not just some.
My feelings haven't changed. I still love him with all my heart. I know that we are opposites in many areas, however, the more I think about us, we fit like a glove. He is calm, laid-back, goes with the flow, spontaneous, whereas I am the more high-strung, planner who can be spontaneous but I like to have an idea at least an hour in advance. He brings comfort and serenity to me and shows me how to be more serene and a better person. We are both open minded and easy going. We both love to laugh and hang out with our families and our friends. He likes Japanese anime and manga, LOVES playing soccer and jogging, ENJOYS playing video games and computer games. Me, I like outdoor activities, play video games to an extent, watch sports and read books. I have learned that we have different ways of handling situations and usually we agree that there is more than one way to handle any given situation. We can talk to each other and see other points of view, and we can talk through just about any discussion or dsiagreement. We both may not like to watch racing or sci-fi... but we have lots to offer together.
I am not completely giving up hope on him, nor am I wanting to make excuses for him. I know that if he makes the decision that it is not good for us to date permanently that he is the one losing the best thing that ever happened to him. I know that I will eventually move on and past this if that does occur. I am not hoping that it does, please don't read into that line like this... I want to be with him. I love him not for who he is, but for who I am when I am with him... I love how I feel when he just reaches over, takes my hand, kisses it and goes back to work... or how he will just look up from working on the computer, wink and me and smile and go back to work, as if he just wants to make sure I am still there. The little things that he does to show that he cares, the little things that I took for granted and now I miss tremendously.
I saw a quote today that read something to the effect of, "The worst kind of missing someone is when you are sitting next to them and know you can't have them." That is where I am right now... I see him online and yet I am trying to keep from messaging him... I am dying to call him to see how his day went and how much progress he made... what good things happened in his life today, what has worried him... It is the worst kind of missing someone when they are right at your fingertips and you can't have them...
I don't want people to think that I am a rude and impolite person. I want people to see me for the person I am. The person who will go out of her way to help others in need and will do anything for my family. I know that I can not change for someone else, or that I shouldn't change specifically for another person. Changing for a person isn't a true change, it is a temporary fix that will eventually unravel. I want to change for me, for my well-being. I am not trying to say that I am an awful or horrible person. I know that I am a good person, I have been reassured of this quite frequently in the past few days... I am just saying that I know that I have room for growth in my life... I want to be a better person, I want to be healthier- eat healthier, workout more, attempt to start jogging again... I want to clean up my language, I have gotten into a bad habit of letting unclean or inappropriate words creep into my vocabulary recently. I want to become a better listener and learn to see things from others perspectives, and recognize when I need to "check" my ego at the door and be willing to look at other perspectives. I need to show the ones that I love that I love them ALL the time, tell them that I am proud of them, bring them up, not break them down. I need to give space when it is needed and when it isn't requested. I can't smother someone with my love, nor can I "dump" all my problems and stress on that person without regards of their personal stresses and stressors. When I do "dump" my stresses, I need to be sure to try to help relieve some of his stresses or be assistive in relieving him of his stresses. I need to show my patient side in ALL areas of life, not just some.
My feelings haven't changed. I still love him with all my heart. I know that we are opposites in many areas, however, the more I think about us, we fit like a glove. He is calm, laid-back, goes with the flow, spontaneous, whereas I am the more high-strung, planner who can be spontaneous but I like to have an idea at least an hour in advance. He brings comfort and serenity to me and shows me how to be more serene and a better person. We are both open minded and easy going. We both love to laugh and hang out with our families and our friends. He likes Japanese anime and manga, LOVES playing soccer and jogging, ENJOYS playing video games and computer games. Me, I like outdoor activities, play video games to an extent, watch sports and read books. I have learned that we have different ways of handling situations and usually we agree that there is more than one way to handle any given situation. We can talk to each other and see other points of view, and we can talk through just about any discussion or dsiagreement. We both may not like to watch racing or sci-fi... but we have lots to offer together.
I am not completely giving up hope on him, nor am I wanting to make excuses for him. I know that if he makes the decision that it is not good for us to date permanently that he is the one losing the best thing that ever happened to him. I know that I will eventually move on and past this if that does occur. I am not hoping that it does, please don't read into that line like this... I want to be with him. I love him not for who he is, but for who I am when I am with him... I love how I feel when he just reaches over, takes my hand, kisses it and goes back to work... or how he will just look up from working on the computer, wink and me and smile and go back to work, as if he just wants to make sure I am still there. The little things that he does to show that he cares, the little things that I took for granted and now I miss tremendously.
I saw a quote today that read something to the effect of, "The worst kind of missing someone is when you are sitting next to them and know you can't have them." That is where I am right now... I see him online and yet I am trying to keep from messaging him... I am dying to call him to see how his day went and how much progress he made... what good things happened in his life today, what has worried him... It is the worst kind of missing someone when they are right at your fingertips and you can't have them...
Saturday, January 03, 2009
The start of a new year
2009 didn't start quite the way I had planned to be honest with you all... I had pictured me and Ethan together on New Years Eve hanging out with his siblings and their significant others... kissing at midnight... just having a good time... INSTEAD... I was at home with my nieces and he was with his siblings and their significant others... we were both miserable and lonely, and not feeling well...
You see... we broke up on Tuesday. This came as a shock to me, a huge shock... my world was turned upside down. To think that a little disagreement on how one should have reacted to the other could turn into this. Well it did...
I have been doing some serious reflecting on my life and who I am. I know some things I want to improve upon in my life, not for him, for me. Although, it would benefit him as it would improve our relationship and our communication. I don't normally make new year's resolutions... they always seem to be broken, and I am very adamant on not making a promise that I can't keep. But this year I did make a resolution.
I want to be a better person. I want to do this by: being healthier, trying new things, working out more, communicating my thoughts and my needs in a better way, being more positive about situations, being a better Christian, and a better listener.
Pray for me as I start out making these changes in my life and be supportive of me in this quest to be a better person. Also pray for me and Ethan, we both need all the thoughts and prayers we can get.
You see... we broke up on Tuesday. This came as a shock to me, a huge shock... my world was turned upside down. To think that a little disagreement on how one should have reacted to the other could turn into this. Well it did...
I have been doing some serious reflecting on my life and who I am. I know some things I want to improve upon in my life, not for him, for me. Although, it would benefit him as it would improve our relationship and our communication. I don't normally make new year's resolutions... they always seem to be broken, and I am very adamant on not making a promise that I can't keep. But this year I did make a resolution.
I want to be a better person. I want to do this by: being healthier, trying new things, working out more, communicating my thoughts and my needs in a better way, being more positive about situations, being a better Christian, and a better listener.
Pray for me as I start out making these changes in my life and be supportive of me in this quest to be a better person. Also pray for me and Ethan, we both need all the thoughts and prayers we can get.
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